My Dogs Are Creepy

I'm not posing them for group pictures anymore. They freak me out. They're all Children Of The Corn and shizzat.

I'm afeared!!

When I saw Piper coming at me through the viewfinder, I shrieked like a little girl and ran away. I'm sure all the onlookers at Bridgeman Park thought I was mentally challenged. I don't care! It was, like, the last thing someone in a horror film would see before they were chopped (or chewed) to pieces by a smiling psychopath!

"Vut seemz to be ze problem? You appear ... dis-turbed."

Today we did a marathon hike at Bridgeman, with our friends Sandy, her adorable TDBCR adoptee Heidi, who is an itty bitty basenji X border collie (no kidding)
Heidi is SO cute. But she has a great big bossy boots for a teeny little dog. Remember this, it'll be revisited later in the blog.

And they brought their foster guest, Cassie, who is available for adoption on our website.

Cassie doesn't look much like what people think of when someone says "border collie" but she is all BC in personality - she is super keen, and super fun, and super smart and just an all around super puppy of about 9 months. She has a great temperament. You should probably adopt her.

Speaking of you ... it never fails to amuse me when when "you" the stranger identify me as The Food Lady when I'm out in public. I mean, I know it's my own fault for obsessively photodocumenting every walk and plastering it all over the internetz, but it still catches me off guard because in my head, I am still anonymous.

*Waves at today's "You're The Food Lady!" guy* Hai! Now you're famous and I'm stalking you.

And hey, while I'm talking to strangers I came across in today's travels ... to the guy honking at me in his Mercedes on 16th Avenue today: Hai! The reason I didn't go around the car in front of me that was making a left is because I could not fit my giant van between it, and the sidewalk. I really appreciate the "snakey" motions your plastic surgery model cum trophy wife was making with her hands to indicate how I could execute the go-around-the-car-in-front-of-me manouever - thanks for that! But while I could have rammed the little honda in front of me, or driven onto the sidewalk to get around her, I did think either of those options was a bit overly dramatic, just to allow you the freedom to resume travelling at 35km per hour in a 50km zone. I want you to know, though, that your incessant honking was music to my ears, and very nearly inspired me to exit my car and paint your lapels with the little ketchup packs in my glove comparment in an artistic fit if my own. You have no idea how close you were to feeling my tomatoey wrath!

"She's ranting again. Everyone stay very still, and don't upset her. Eventually she will run out of steam. Feel free to look exasperated while waiting it out though. Gawd knows I will."

We arrived at the park a little early (which is how the scary Posed Creepy Dogs idea came to life) and I was randomly taking photos of passing dogs by bribing them with cookies.

Like this Cheseapeake Bay Retriever

Who felt I did not hand over the cookies fast enough, and was not shy about telling me as much.

And this Lab, who looks very sweet in his photo, but tried to eat my camera, and the pocket that held the blessed cookies. I'm really starting to rethink the Cookie Strategy.

This sweetie, who is a BC X Rottweiler, sat politely, posed cutely and waited patiently for her promised cookie. Good dog!

Tweed and Heidi were pretty impatient with all the stopping and photo taking.

Tweed wanted to be on his way.

Cassie too!

I bet they didn't know that they'd meet a Dandie Dinmont Terrier whilst on the road though. I mean, I sure didn't. I wasn't even totally sure they actually existed in real life, just on the internetz. But then we saw this one, who is apparently the Champion Of Everything Plus Something Else Fancy He Just Won Last Week. I'm not a dog show person so I didn't understand any of it, but he sure had really big eyes for a really small dog.
He was pretty cute.

As we ambled down the road, I was musing over what kind of Huff I'd like to storm off in, and decided that if at all possible, I think I'd like to storm off in a beat up old early 1970's farmer style pickup truck Huff. But in order to do that, I think I would need a dog like ...

this.

Everybody sing it with me now ...

MAYBE TOMORROW, I'LL WANNA SETTLE DOWN.
UNTIL TOMORROW, I'LL JUST KEEP MOVIN' ON.
UNTIL TOMORROW, THE WHOLE WORLD IS MY HOME....

I think she was a WolfDog, and she was super cool looking. And huge. 90 lbs of huge, to be exact.

90lbs of huge, however, is no match for 20lbs of Very Bossy Boots.


I told you!

"And don't even THINK about bothering that poor mastiff either!"


After the last entry, someone asked me why Mr. Woo's soccer ball, which is clearly labeled "Adidas" is called Fifa (tm). So if I may take you back in time, to the days of The Very First Fifa. Fifa The First was a soccer ball we found abandoned in an alley, and Woo tenderly adopted it. That soccer ball happened to say "FIFA" on it and so has every subsequent replacement ball been called Fifa (tm). And there have been a few, starting with the very sad loss of Fifa The First and the garish subpar replacement ball.

"And He who walks behind the rows did say; I will send outlanders amongst you... a man and a woman, and these outlanders will be unbelievers and profaners of the holy and the man will sorely test you. for he has great power, even greater than that of the blue man!"

AHHHHHH! RUN AWAY RUN AWAY!