Friday, November 07, 2008

"Ahm STAHVIN' Ova Heeya!"

"Ahm dyin'. Swear ta gawd, Ahm dyin' ah hungah."

"That damn Food Lady. All she gives me ta eat is cahdboard."

"And Piper ovah dere, she's gotta eat puppies. Puppies! It's criminal, Ah tell ya. Jest look at 'er."

"I'm so hungry. I ate Scooby Doo. I had no choice."

"NOOOOO! Don't take it! It's mine! I'm eating it!"

"It's mine now, Wooface! Give it to me, or I'll eat you too!"


"Whad Ah tell ya? It's slim pickins. That Food Lady is such a who-"

TWEED! Watch your mouth young man!

"Yeah, yeah. Ahm watchin' it ... Ahm watchin' it eat CAHDBOARD cuz yah stahvin' me ta death."

"Whoa, whoa, hold on a second heeya. Is that a turkey neck you got there? Hey hey hey, Ah wuz jest kiddin' witcha. Howz about a truce? Let's shake on it."


"OMG! OMG! OMG! Can I have some? Please??"


(polite) NOMNOMNOM!

Food Lady, I believe the dogs are nutz.
Oh no wait. I'm Nutz. Never mind.

Hey! Who put this voodoo doll up??

"What? Whaddaya lookin' at me foh?"


So recently I went out to SAINTS in Mission, BC. SAINTS is an end-of-life sanctuary for the aged and terminally animals that our (bleeping) society likes to dump when they need their people the most.

Ostensibly, I was asked to go out there to take photos. In reality, I think SAINTS founder Carol was trying to marry me off to a lonely steer, who indeed was very fond of me.
^^ lovesick cow. Most action I've had in ages.

Carol says I'm kinda ornery. I think she's mixed me up with this goat, who had just finished headbutting this very pissed off dog when I took this picture.

Ha! I like goats.

There were lots of heartbreakingly adorable animals, big and small, who are safe thanks to SAINTS. It makes me feel all warm and fuzzy.

Want to feel warm and fuzzy too? Pay a visit to SAINTS and volunteer for a day, or donate to their efforts! I'll be going back, but this time I'm a) wearing a cowproof suit of armour and b) checking my car carefully for poodles before I go leave!


Mutt Gal said...

I also want to kick people in the shins when they abandon the critters who have devoted their entire lives to their human family.

Love your storytelling, as always. Turkey necks are a favorite around here, too. And funny enough, my dogs were eating cardboard today in the form of an egg carton. Apparently I'm a member of your "starving dogs" club.

Thanks for the smiles, as always.

Lisa said...

Is that a Chihuahua I see in one of the SAINTS pics?

Black Jack's Carol said...

Thanks for yet another amusing and superbly photographed post. And for the reminder about SAINTS. Perhaps the most appropriately named place I can imagine.

riosmom said...

Pictures and commentary are perfect. You really should consider writing a children's book. I can see it now - the "Woo Series", the "Tweed Series", and "Mad Teeth" with lots of cross-cultivation. Children and adults would love them.

The Saints site is very moving - kleenex are advised.

Anonymous said...

i told you percy loves cameras (and those that carry them too!) and i also said you were "spikey"....edith is an ornery goat, you are spikey sheena, the woo-ier queen.
thx for coming out and photo shooting our old guys so remarkably.

Anonymous said...

I second Riosmom's comment. I also think "spikey" is a great descriptive word for you, your pets AND your blog!

Thanks for the blog and the entertainment it provides~

Simon's Mom

Allie Oop said...

Hoo boy, when I saw the title of your post I thought things must have REALLY gotten grim in your neck of the woods and I was getting ready to mail a care package to BC (which wouldn't have smelled too nice by the time it got there).

I was sure happy to see those turkey necks . . . .

Your photos of the SAINTS group were very touching and I really enjoyed them.


Carol said...

Great photos and commentary. Woo anticipating is absolutely the epitome of hopeful dog!

Tweed just loves to pose for the portraits, doesn't he?

Always special to see Nutz. She is one of a kind. How is she doing without access to a deck? With no more opportunity for performance art involving birds, is she taking it out on the dogs?

The Border Collies said...

How is she doing without access to a deck? With no more opportunity for performance art involving birds, is she taking it out on the dogs?

No, she's taking it out on me! More specifically, on my feet. She has taken to stalking and attacking my toes at night under the covers. I don't mind - I definitely prefer it to dead bird - but you know, without access to the deck she is getting chubby :( She runs around a lot, but I don't think she burns the same amount of calories as she does hunting prey. It's kind of sad.

Your photos of the SAINTS group were very touching and I really enjoyed them.

Aww, good! You should try going there. It's even more touching. Except for the goat. That's just plain funny!

MaskedMan said...


Since when did your dogs develop a 'Bama accent..?

Agreed, on the SAINTS photos - I panned through the entire album - something I rarely do for anyone - And found many an image there with which to fall in love.

The Border Collies said...

Since when did your dogs develop a 'Bama accent..?

Hmmm ... I guess my accent transcription skills need work because it was supposed to be more like a hybrid of a Boston - New York accent. Poop.

Jennifer said...

I totally got the Boston/New York accents!! Of course, that is my neck of the woods. Love your photos and commentary. I am addicted to your blog, thanks for the entertainment!!

MaskedMan said...

I suppose it's a matter of familiarity. Shift the emphasis ever so slightly, and change the speed just a bit, and you can morph 'most any accent into another. I've spent more time in Alabama than in New York or Massachusets, so I 'hear' what is familiar, no doubt.