tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-27165799.post5017771566435930663..comments2023-07-24T04:50:52.803-07:00Comments on 3 Woofs & A Woo on Wootube!: Mommy will kick you until you're dead.Unknownnoreply@blogger.comBlogger92125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-27165799.post-56565527321166541912010-03-08T09:41:33.220-08:002010-03-08T09:41:33.220-08:00nothing as creative as yours and other commenters&...nothing as creative as yours and other commenters', but I frequently tell my kids that their mothers were mongrels. Nope, doesn't do any good either.Pet Guilthttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03638050876959175637noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-27165799.post-73335037047351476692010-03-05T12:47:59.053-08:002010-03-05T12:47:59.053-08:00Thank you, thank you, thank you. I almost feel nor...Thank you, thank you, thank you. I almost feel normal again.Marhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17348673784561896371noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-27165799.post-14811199643468584932010-03-02T22:28:01.664-08:002010-03-02T22:28:01.664-08:00'Ello 'ello. I just found you blog. I just...'Ello 'ello. I just found you blog. I just fiished reading every post and a couple of comments, going back to the one about the owl in the pine after you first moved.<br /><br />Boy, you landed in my version of heaven! I can, after all, buy a espresso maker. What part of the country do you live in? I hail from Minnesota, in the heart of the Metro. And am planning my eventual escape to the stix even now...afinstromhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15634551190073419093noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-27165799.post-56989478005815652082010-03-01T15:29:50.370-08:002010-03-01T15:29:50.370-08:00When Mellie is barkscreaming at me while we're...When Mellie is barkscreaming at me while we're trying to practice flyball with some other dog: "Nobody likes you!" Sadly, my 12 year old teammate has picked this up. I'm such a bad influence. <br /><br />This doesn't look as bad in print as it sounds in voice.nickelsmumhttp://companionanimalsolutions.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-27165799.post-32328309327707261132010-03-01T13:37:43.286-08:002010-03-01T13:37:43.286-08:00How about comments to my horse? I've threatene...How about comments to my horse? I've threatened to sell him for glue on more than one occasion!Wendynoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-27165799.post-52619384853282231262010-03-01T11:02:50.166-08:002010-03-01T11:02:50.166-08:00I'm pretty boring with the old, "its a go...I'm pretty boring with the old, "its a good thing you're cute or else I would have killed you by now". And although I have a lab and a pug, I will sometimes sing to them "But a greyhound fur tuxedo would be best!" a la Mr. Burns. Maybe they would take my threat more seriously if they were actually greyhounds...Sabrinanoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-27165799.post-39325983242918650732010-03-01T09:05:40.318-08:002010-03-01T09:05:40.318-08:00OMG I love it. Good to know i'm not alone.
I ...OMG I love it. Good to know i'm not alone.<br /><br />I have 2 dogs who are v. v. different. One is more sensitive than the other.<br /><br />The less sensitive I threaten to sell. Which is the only thing that works.<br /><br />I've been threatening to tie my other dog to the top of the car for the long drive home for about a year. :) For little things i can usually leave it at: F*'in quit it. Nobody likes that dog.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-27165799.post-49914567579836915582010-03-01T08:30:18.197-08:002010-03-01T08:30:18.197-08:00We threaten to put our cat in the microwave. I don...We threaten to put our cat in the microwave. I don't even think he knows what it is but it shuts him up :)<br /><br />For the dogs there's too many lol. Though I affectionately call my GSD/Collie mix "A little b!tch"Stephaniehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08692549320039650012noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-27165799.post-23497263660135772332010-03-01T06:48:18.166-08:002010-03-01T06:48:18.166-08:00Well, hubby is frequently heard to say (to either ...Well, hubby is frequently heard to say (to either dog) "I will kick you where your balls used to be"; for Dozer, it's "Get the F**k off me you horse, I should sell you for glue". We have also used the "kick you in the but so hard you will have your ass for a hat" one.<br />Also, this works well for dogs and boys (just sub. 'arm' for 'leg'): "I will tear your leg off and beat you with it!"<br />Probably good that we don't have any close neighbors.....!Wallflowerhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12404935699110847266noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-27165799.post-69479804974275767692010-03-01T05:37:12.834-08:002010-03-01T05:37:12.834-08:00I tell my BC's that I'm going to beat the ...I tell my BC's that I'm going to beat the black off them. They pretty much ignore my threats!Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-27165799.post-55419923447403291512010-02-28T16:14:08.230-08:002010-02-28T16:14:08.230-08:00I'm sure my neighbours could tell you a thing ...I'm sure my neighbours could tell you a thing or two! Mostly my dogs hear me screaming..."BLUE NEEDLE! Do you hear me? Blue needle is what you are going to get you ungrateful little shits!"Performance Caninehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11531347476962932936noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-27165799.post-81746421652656407782010-02-28T12:16:58.310-08:002010-02-28T12:16:58.310-08:00I threatened to flush Caliber down the toilet........I threatened to flush Caliber down the toilet.....Finoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-27165799.post-71840069875739678572010-02-28T11:38:02.606-08:002010-02-28T11:38:02.606-08:00You missed some of our greater hits.
¨I will beat...You missed some of our greater hits.<br /><br />¨I will beat you until you bleed from the eyes¨.<br /><br />¨Who want some blue sweet baby jesus juice?¨ (anyone who has ever worked in a shelter just went oh-my-god-no-she-does-not-say-that. Or they´re so screwed up they´re going to use it.<br /><br />Thibadeux, the brain damaged Katrina pit bull, gets told her ass will get shipped back to Louisiana and we will find her a nice pickup to chain her to while she waits for the levies to go again.<br /><br />Also whenever you ask my ex what he did today he always starts with ´well first I beat Thibadeux with a baseball bat/vacuum cleaner/mallet.´ It´s a running joke but sometimes he forgets and says to someone who doesn´t get it.<br /><br />´Who wants to wind up in a dumpster?´<br /><br />´Don´t make me get the board with the nails in it´. <br /><br />You just finish telling everyone what a saint I am and I cop to this. Oy.<br /><br />Thank you!Finnhttp://www.rabidgoats.wordpress.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-27165799.post-58843945287782247062010-02-28T00:42:21.678-08:002010-02-28T00:42:21.678-08:00insane dog owner has mine down pat.
Oh fer f*** s...insane dog owner has mine down pat.<br /><br />Oh fer f*** sakes!<br /><br />I also ask my blind 8 month old GSD a million times a day "are you f***ing crazy? <br /><br />He's bonked his head so many times he may well be.<br /><br />He also hears quite often "stop poking the bear!!" when he is bugging on my 10 year old male grump.Colleenhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09277865083446912686noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-27165799.post-16803721538367745842010-02-27T17:34:06.977-08:002010-02-27T17:34:06.977-08:00Threats to the horse. I call him:
1. Alpo
2. E...Threats to the horse. I call him:<br /><br />1. Alpo<br />2. Elmer<br /><br />Threats to the barking Aussies:<br /><br />1. I am gonna rip your f'ing head off. <br />2. Yes, Gale the neighbors all know you are home. Now we are going to have to go to the pound because I am over the legal limit.<br />3. You want to die young don't you?<br />4. You're killing me and then you will be homeless.<br /><br />General:<br /><br />1. You have GOT to be kidding me.<br />2. . NOW. <br />3. For fuck's sake. (<y personal favorite. Covers so much.)<br />4. And they say border collies are SMART?Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-27165799.post-12597372560238456732010-02-27T14:00:35.382-08:002010-02-27T14:00:35.382-08:00I think I'm gonna have to borrow some of these...I think I'm gonna have to borrow some of these threats. Heh. I use mostly one of three threats:<br /><br />1. I'm going to leash you to the faucet in the bathtub and leave you there all day.<br /><br />2. Don't make me get a new dog. <br /><br />3. I'm going to let the cats ninja your face into next Friday.Sheynoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-27165799.post-28673289629843049872010-02-27T11:51:42.281-08:002010-02-27T11:51:42.281-08:00Soup.
Dog soup.Soup.<br />Dog soup.Leslie Haweshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17933649274394414938noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-27165799.post-78138009993670284902010-02-27T10:08:27.722-08:002010-02-27T10:08:27.722-08:00I've been know to threaten to rip intestines o...I've been know to threaten to rip intestines out through the nostrils. I also tell them to make the life affirming choice. What is wild though is all the cats, the dog, and my (17 year old)son know to stop all the nonsense if I start counting. It has never been established what I would do but they get the message.CarolG.noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-27165799.post-16270111410753882702010-02-27T09:06:51.540-08:002010-02-27T09:06:51.540-08:00I channel the "soup nazi" from Seinfeld,...I channel the "soup nazi" from Seinfeld, saying, "no food for you!". Of course, I inevitably give in, because she gives me the death-stare-of-cuteness, and I melt. I'll probably have more original sayings when we try out agility this summer.Ktbug Ladydidhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02602934106118038500noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-27165799.post-60175949850850109052010-02-27T08:19:00.282-08:002010-02-27T08:19:00.282-08:00Most commonly heard threat at my house: "I...Most commonly heard threat at my house: "I'm going to take you to a very public place and beat you, then bring you home and beat you again." When I'm angry at both of them, "Sam, I'm going to beat you first, and then you, Shonie, and then I'm going to beat Sam again."<br /><br />Said fairly often to Shoshone, "Cute won't save you now"<br /><br />General all around threat, when I've had Just Too Much, "I'm going to sell you all for purposes of scientific experiment, and buy a picture of a fish."<br /><br />DH's favorite: "You're going back to the pound and we'll get a REAL dog with a work ethic."<br /><br />Very creative threats, here, thanks for the great laughs. And Sheena, thanks for keeping on.<br /><br />RuthRuth Hansellhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/18239191084142745476noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-27165799.post-65402722783233080522010-02-27T08:13:38.058-08:002010-02-27T08:13:38.058-08:00Hehe!
I have a three-legged cattle dog mix. Short...Hehe!<br /><br />I have a three-legged cattle dog mix. Shortly after I got him I was out doing yard work and the dogs were hanging out with me. Elo would NOT stop barking--at cars, people, noises, planes flying over the yard, birds, everything. I happened to have a saw in my hand. He looked up at me and I told him ever so sweetly, "yes, this is what we're going to use to cut your OTHER leg off!!!" <br /><br />I'm a big fan of channeling frustration into ridiculous threats!Ninsohttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11926615638315977082noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-27165799.post-57903947691785088702010-02-27T07:44:42.774-08:002010-02-27T07:44:42.774-08:00"BACK TO THE KENNEL!!!" and he'll st..."BACK TO THE KENNEL!!!" and he'll stick as close to me as possible for the rest of the walk - maybe that will stop Mr Woo from disappearing half the time :)Tristan and Braunhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15716687252293942018noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-27165799.post-44171484596948072232010-02-27T06:50:32.929-08:002010-02-27T06:50:32.929-08:00I often threaten to toss Inara out of the window o...I often threaten to toss Inara out of the window of the moving car...and I tell her that I'd have no regrets.<br /><br />I also like the 2X4 comment, and often tell my guys that they're gonna get beat upside the head with one. <br /><br />And of course..."I'm going to beat you all senseless!"<br /><br /><br />I tell my friends that this is why I'm a positive reinforcement trainer...otherwise I'd follow through with my threats.TheRedQueenhttp://www.red-rover.biznoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-27165799.post-25645491125181389372010-02-27T06:49:09.940-08:002010-02-27T06:49:09.940-08:00The most common threat around here is, "I'...The most common threat around here is, "I'm gonna beat the black off of you!" (We have 3 black labs)<br /><br />Otherwise, we mostly get out our frustration with them through name calling...some of our favorites are whore, bitch, nutjob, punk and psycho. Side note: Before I was a dog owner, I used to be APPALLED when my sister called her dog a whore. Now that is probably the most-used name around here. hahaUnknownhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06015474404014656396noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-27165799.post-52830424831840060842010-02-27T06:43:59.350-08:002010-02-27T06:43:59.350-08:00I threaten the cat with making her into soup the n...I threaten the cat with making her into soup the next time she messes with the blinds. I think she realizes that it is an empty threat:)Susanhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02770053255303046944noreply@blogger.com